Dial tones

Talking on the telephone is not my forte. Let me clarify this: talking to anyone that is not a family or friend is not my forte. It is not social ungraceness on my part (my pride rings in there), but rather, it is lack of understanding. On the receiver end, they lack patience or clarity of how my Captel phone works (though it is the first thing I explain); on my end, it is the words…I sit in delay. And today’s phone call to my pharmacy definitely proved this to be true.

Timely communication. In our fast-paced world, we expect it. And when you face the untimely pair–Deaf person and the automatic voice communicator spouting number options in order to connect the call to a different line, when I just want to talk to a human being), it confuses the system. And when you’re the one on the slower end, it can get to you…very much like the feeling when your “taking too much time paying as fast as you can in the grocery store line.” We can’t handle untimeliness.

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Over the years, I have had many interesting phone conversations while using Sprint Captel online: some calls I literally yelled at the receiver end as their lack of patience exposed my own lack of patience and anger; others I cried, still others I had a pleasant chat. Then I just stopped all phone communication. When I finally restarted, using the Captel land-line phone, it felt like re-learning communication. Dad and I made some test calls; I was so nervous. But the feeling didn’t last long. How could it?, when I finally was able to call my grandparents. 😀

Being Deaf, I could choose to use untimely communication in life as crutch. I would rather use it as a staff, moving forward and learning lessons.

I must speak simply and clearly. Find me alone, and I tend to over talk. It even shows in my writing. Everything must have an explanation. I must define, describe and be known. I want to be heard,  but sometimes being heard means meekness.

Slow conversation doesn’t have to be a hindrance. In fact, it can be enjoyable. Here’s why: when I am waiting for my words to be encrypted, I have to “listen” and even though I can’t hear the voice over the line or timely lip-read, I am processing what the person is saying without thinking of my next “sudden response.” When I sit in a person-to-person chat or talk on Skype, the timely communication effects this “think-while-silent process.” It goes in full reverse, focusing back on myself. When I focus on others, I receive more joy.

Untimely calls can make a difference in someone’s day. And in return, it blesses mine.




Filed under Adjusting to NF2, Family Times, Uncategorized

3 responses to “Dial tones

  1. I am familiar with having conversations when you can’t understand what is being said. My son Jeff bought a very expensive smart phone and when he calls us I can only understand about every third word. I apologize to him and tell him if I answer strangely it’s because I’m not hearing clearly what he is saying to me. What makes it worse is that I long to hear from him and talk with him so I always try my hardest to concentrate on what he is saying. My daughter Deborah also mentioned that she hears Jeff’s conversations the same way and she lives in the same town that he does. I am blessed with a sister that is 92% deaf. I would love it if we could contact each other. I suggested that she get a small computer and we could e-mail each other, but she doesn’t want one. I do miss keeping in touch with family…they are a large part of my life. However I am very thankful that there are phones and computers making it possible to keep in touch with family and friends. Happy that you have Captel land-line phone:) You are a blessing to so many people. Love you!

  2. Megan

    So I’m guilty of not having called any of our grandparents in a very long time:( I need to do this! Thank you for the reminder that despite my lack of making time to do this, that it’s okay to slow down and make calls *Megs

  3. Megan

    P.S. I know that may have been a weird response to this post but that’s what came to mind primarily other than I’m thankful you have Captel so that you can make outgoing calls – one more way you can be independent for as long as possible:):):) XOXOXOXOXO ~ Megs

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