This probably will sound absurd. It probably is. However, this morning I was needed. It wasn’t anything urgent and could have waited (I suppose), but at the moment, I decided to take action myself. I wanted to be depended upon. I needed, for myself, the reverse psychology thinking–being the giver..instead of the dependent. One small gesture gratified this. 
This is Muffy. He’s my cat. He’ll be ten (in human years) this Fall and has used four of his “nine lives.” He’s pretty special. When we lived in Colorado, all our cats were outside cats, making their home in the back of the barn. I never saw any mice! When we moved, Muff and his brother cat, Tux, had to do major adjusting as we had no barn. We tried purchasing a small dog house and placed it on the patio. It wasn’t appreciated at first (although Muff finally started using it, but prefers the cushioned lawn chairs.) As for Tux, he discovered the shed across the street. I always thought it funny as I referenced them in parallel to the personalities of Jacob and Esau (Genesis 25), because they certainly acted like it.
Now that it is just Muffy in our family, he has had to make more adjustments. He still loves the outdoors and when the grass grew so tall at the unoccupied neighbor’s house–Muffy was living in a jungle dream. I now have seen many, many mice (more left-over version, sad to say.) The Winter months were harsh, so he spent a lot of time indoors; in the summer, sometimes he comes in on extremely warm/humid days. Outside, he claims one specific patio chair that we placed a green blanket on like a basket-shape. Inside, he now claims my bed; or his newest fancy–the “underworld” between my mattress and the floor.
Taking care of Muff used to be a cinch. Now, I not only depend on my family to help with my own needs, but also taking care of Muffy…even something as simple as placing his food dish out on the patio. And that is where my morning story takes place:
Muffy has now, too, discovered the coolness (in literal terms) of the shed across the street, so it was no surprise to me that he didn’t come when I called his name out the screen door with a short, “Here kitty, kitty.” I ate my own breakfast and when I decided upon a piece of toast, my eye caught a whiff of black on my turn to the pantry. “Hi, Muffy!” The main door being closed, he somehow sensed my talking to him, because he started the “cat dance”: tail swishing, head twisting, rubbing his nose against the screen door. “Are you hungry?” My obvious inquiry is answered with another cat dance.
I push my walker to the laundry room and get a dish of food. I had noticed Marcia’s hallway light to her upstairs bedroom was on, as well as the basement. Figuring that she was awake and in either one of those two places (she was gone–unknown to me), I text her and ask if she can help get Muffy’s food to the patio. As I wait for a reply, Muffy’s cat dances are getting pathetically cuter and I just decide–“I’m going to do this! (somehow)” Even though it is only two steps down, there is only a side handle, so logically, it is not safe for me to try to hold the food dish and screen door open with one hand and try to backhand grab the handle–it is complicated and doesn’t work…I already tried it numerous ways.
To avoid a Lifeline escapade, I open the door and stick my right foot out to avoid Muffy running inside. He just rubs his head against your foot regardless. I quickly set the dish on the first step just out of reach for the closing door line. Muffy is thrilled and starts munching away on his bland, dry breakfast food. I close the door and smiled. I just fed my cat his breakfast. 🙂
I often forget that God desires to be the Giver. He gives, even when I don’t ask, and I take the blessings for granted. He gives because He Loves. When I receive that blessing and share it with others, God too receives the glory.
Therefore the LORD waits to be gracious to you, and therefore he exalts himself to show mercy to you. For the LORD is a God of justice; blessed are all those who wait for him.
Isaiah 30:18, ESV
My Life with NF2 