When waters still

I’m not a person who dreams of a vacation at the beach. I am not one you would find fishing while sitting in a boat, kayaking down a river or swimming in the ocean, signing up for snorkeling lessons, or being a lifeguard; I don’t even like swimming pools. Maybe because we didn’t grow up near beaches, but did fish/canoe in the mountain lakes and there was a nice hot springs about an hour from home that we sometimes went to in the evenings, big bodies of water are not something I enjoy. They scare me: the depth of the waters and what is unknown underneath is what it is. That and I can only backstroke.

This past weekend, we visited family in Wisconsin. My uncle is very passionate about sail boats and sailing, so it was no surprise that we discussed a sailing adventure, as it was going to be a full moon and the winds would not be as bad in the evening. I had to humble myself and remind my lack of enthusiasm (plus I was feeling extremely sick all weekend, but no excuse) that even though sailing was nothing I loved, it was something that my extended family did as a family activity and I should at least follow along and enjoy being with them rather than moping in negative thoughts.

We had to borrow their jackets, gloves and hats as we were not prepared for how cold it turned out to be, but once we layered up, we were on our way. Me, getting on the boat, would have been a Youtube video sensation. 🙂 Once I got on the boat, I sat and didn’t move until we made it back to the dock. I must admit, I had momentary jealous thoughts, because my cousins were balancing on the front of the boat just hanging on to the sail’s ropes. You would never catch me doing that sort of thing!

We get to the middle of the lake and it is a pretty view…darkness had settled in for the evening and all around the shores were lights shining. Then the wind stopped. Inner panic set in and the first thing I think of is C.S. Lewis’ Voyage of the Dawn Treader in the Chronicles of Narnia series where they experience a time of no winds. Of course we were not in a huge boat and have modern technology, so after trying to get a natural wind..we ended up having to use the motor to return.

I did find just sitting there–although thinking Narnia thoughts–relaxing, and when I stopped panicking, almost peaceful. Then I remembered how opposite the situation was for Jesus’s disciples:

And when he [Jesus] got into the boat, his disciples followed him. And behold, there arose a great storm on the sea, so that the boat was being swamped by the waves; but he was asleep.  And they went and woke him, saying, “Save us, Lord; we are perishing.” And he said to them, “Why are you afraid, O you of little faith?” Then he rose and rebuked the winds and the sea, and there was a great calm. And the men marveled, saying, “What sort of man is this, that even winds and sea obey him?” Matthew 8:23-27

If anything, my weekend was much like the seas in this passage–just personally in all the physical, mental and emotional. I am not sure why it all flooded in at the same time, but last night–once again crying myself to sleep–I told God that I didn’t know what to do about pretty much everything (mostly physical as that affects everything else.) I don’t even remember what my words were because I found myself in a deep, calm sleep. It was as if Jesus rebuked my waging body and instead told my being, “Peace. Be still.”

I still woke up feeling the same physically…but felt refreshed mentally and emotionally. There are going to be more storms in life…but I shouldn’t fear them: I am secure in The Lifeboat.


Filed under Adjusting to NF2, Books and Movies, Family Times

5 responses to “When waters still

  1. Lois

    What an adventure – night sailing with Uncle Tom! Wow! Your comment about a youtube video of you getting in the boat made me laugh and made my imagination run wild! Love you, Mel. You are safe in that Lifeboat, but the seas may be rough at times. Hang on to Jesus!

  2. I love that you decided to go along for the ride:) Sometimes we miss out on something (that God meant to bring us joy with) because it isn’t something we enjoy doing. I love your courage too. But mostly I love your relationship with our Lord and Savior. It is that relationship that brings us to our knees and at his feet and gives us peace.

  3. Kathy

    Mel, grab all of life you can. This is truely an adventure and it all has value at the end of each day. Oh, so thankful for YOU and your courage. I look forward to each post from you. I share you with students here at MVHS.

  4. marcie

    Sounds like an adventure! And the Youtube video made me smile- i like your sense of humor, Mel!
    As to the lesson learned, and lesson applied, it is so encouraging to read your life journal and to see that no matter how it changes, the Rock of Ages is forever stable, unchanging!
    I love you sweet girl!

  5. Megan

    I love you sis:) This truly tugged at my heart strings as I can relate to the feelings you have for bodies of water… of course, you know that I dislike water as well and can only doggie paddle at best. I think it’s because we didn’t grow up near lakes and didn’t spend much time at swimming pools or anything like that which is why we are the way we are – and, I’m okay with that;) I’m glad you got to experience night time sailing though… wow! What an adventure indeed! So thankful that in the storms of life, we really can be safe in The Lifeboat:D Miss you! XOXO, Megs

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