Let me catch my breath.

Hey all!! 😀

Last week I spent my time chasing after my nose as it kept running away from me!!!! (Get it??? HAHA!) Ok–I had a bad cold and I was taking care of my sister’s dog for the week, so my energy was not much of anything. Sorry if I had anyone worried. I am doing much better…cold is gone…and the sick stomach issue that I have going on due to some of the new medicines is now mostly under control (I hope). Nothing like the excuse for a big cup of peppermint tea! 😀 ‘Tis the season!!

This past weekend was fun! Saturday night we went to the town’s parade of lights. It was short and festive and bright. It was really a good time though. Afterwards, the shops were open, free coffee was distributed and people filled the street. My sister and I even got a picture with Santa.

Sunday we ventured to downtown Dayton for the musical performance based on Irving Berlin’s White Christmas. It was very well done! The dancing and choreography was amazing! I really had a good time and it helped me forget about my sick stomach and pain spasms. I was a bit grumpy that morning–like a Scrooge. I need to work on not being grumpy when I am tired and in pain. It is not fair to those around me, especially my family. We all enjoyed the play and I especially look forward to the spring musical: Mary Poppins!! 😀

Monday was Mom’s Christmas cookie exchange party. We ladies enjoyed a time of cookie taste-testing, talking, a few Christmas hymns and a devotion on gratitude. The party was a lot of fun. I baked my favorite cookie–Peppermint Candy Canes. Be sure to check back later this week, because I will post the recipe. 😀

And today, Mom and I ventured to the college student center for their noon-hour music presentation of different Christmas songs by different groups of students. We heard some group singing, bell presentation songs, a little jazz and my favorite–the flute ensemble. 🙂 I do miss playing the flute. But this is where I learned last night to have a heart of gratitude. I cannot understand why I lost my hearing and hand function (all needed to play the flute). In college, I finally learned to stop asking the question, “Why me?” And I was content.

I guess the blood clot is when my attitude started to change back to the old questionable self that I was. Things leveled out, then I stopped work (for mostly health related issues). And I have not been able to get back to where I used to be in my relationship with God. I am not bitter–not even asking why really. More–“You just have to be the One to do something about all this because I am tired of trying.” And that attitude wears me down. It comes and goes like my pain spasms but I need to start taking those thoughts and turning them into gratitude for all that God has done for me.

Today as I listened to the flute ensemble, I remembered that I can be thankful for the memories of when I did have the chance to play; I can be thankful that my hearing aids allowed me to hear them being played today; and I can be thankful that God sees any resounding noise as praise as long as it is from a heart of worship to Him. A resounding noise. I think that best describes me. My scratchy voice can’t sing, but I can’t help but sing anyway; I can’t play an instrument, but I paint with my hands; and I can’t always know the reason why, but I can trust God does.

I see a pattern in my life. It always comes down to that last segment of the sentence, about not knowing all the answers–which means I am not in control. I think I struggle most with this, because I fight so hard against my decaying aging body to be normal and do things under my control with no other help. “I am fine. I can do this.” It starts the wall…and God slowly starts to tear it down, reminding me that I cannot do this on my own. Look at all He has done. I think about even just this year alone. It was a hard year…and yet it was so perfectly orchestrated. Just is so awesome to think about and share. I love writing these thoughts out, because then my mind sees it on “paper” and I start to understand and learn from it. Thank you for being part of this journey with me. I look forward to writing more in the days to come.

Your friend, Mel